One Million and Beyond

Family and Money don’t always mix

By Matt - Monday, April 16th, 2007

This is one of those things you hear about every now and then where families don’t talk to each other because of some money issue. I would never have thought it possible with my parents since they’ve never really interfered with my life nor have I asked for money all that often. But in the process of planning the wedding they’ve started sticking their noses in without asking nor getting our input. This has obviously led to arguments and under normal circumstances this would be the end of it. Unfortunately they started to pull out the trump card so to speak because we asked them for financial help so we wouldn’t have to get into debt over it. The trump card being: “we’re paying for X of this so we want it this way”. Needless to say this went over like a lead balloon and we’ve resolved the issue and asked them to never bring it up or we’d simply not take their money and go into debt and forgo a honeymoon.

My crisis has been averted but it definitely brought to light how quickly a simple thing can turn very ugly when money is held over someone’s head. I know now that it’s a very annoying and intrusive when someone tries to railroad your plans with money as a trump card. In our case it was a minor point that we were able to resolve but that’s not always the case and I’m no longer surprised that so many people have issues discussing money with family – especially if they need it.

Also on a personal note I don’t think I’m going to ask my parents for financial help unless there is no choice (and no credit is available). I don’t want to be in the situation where I stop speaking to my parents because both sides decide to be ornery. I’m also going to try to remember this so when my children (when I have them) need money I don’t hold it over their heads.

Technorati Tags: wedding, money, reason to fight

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